At least when the kids were toddlers you could shove them in bed at 7pm and, apart from several middleofthenight shout outs, they'd largely remain there till some un-godly early hour when they decided it was morning.
Fast forward to the teenage years and all routine goes out of the window. They seem to suddenly come alive around 9pm and finally decide to embark on whatever task you've been nagging them to do since 4pm. REALLY LOUDLY. And it seems that 10.30pm is the optimum time to have a shower. With loud music on. And singing. And who doesn't want a late night snack when the house has been locked up, the alarm is set and all the lights are out?
The other half has taken to wearing ear plugs in bed. So if there's a fire in the middle of the night night he's probably fucked.
The mornings however are a different story. They've obviously got hold of Neil's ear plug stash because they don't hear a bloody thing. No amount of shouting and banging seems to rouse them. I'm beyond bored of hearing myself say that it's time to get up. It's like REALLY time to get up. Will you just P L E A S E get out of bed. YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE! JUST GET OUT OF BLOODY BED NOW!!!!!
Matters have not been helped by the fact that I'm allowing the youngest to stay up and watch I'm A Celebrity. Every night. Because he can't possibly be the only kid at school who doesn't know what's going on in the jungle can he?
Is it nearly Christmas?
My mum used to use the ice cold wet face cloth to get me up. After the first time, she only had to threaten me with it...
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